The truth is, finding lasting meaning in life is one of the deepest and most universal human desires. Think about it, we all want to feel like our lives matter—that our actions, relationships and experiences have a sense of purpose and must be worth something.

But in a world that often feels chaotic and annoyingly unpredictable, it’s easy to feel lost or disconnected, wondering what this whole fuss of existing is even for. Still, I’m happy to announce to you that meaning isn’t something you stumble upon; it’s something you can create intentionally, starting now.

In this post, we’ll explore practical, evidence-based strategies—rooted in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and positive psychology—that can help you discover and sustain a meaningful life. Whether you’re searching for direction or hoping to deepen the sense of purpose you already have, this guide will give you the tools to create a life that feels rich and fulfilling, not just in the short term but for years to come.

Why do we crave meaning in life?

Humans are wired to seek meaning. Psychologist Viktor Frankl, a Holocaust survivor and author of ‘Man’s Search for Meaning’, famously said that the search for meaning is the primary motivation in life. He discovered that even in the most brutal circumstances, those who found a sense of purpose were more resilient and better able to cope with suffering.

When we lack meaning in our lives, it can lead to feelings of emptiness, boredom, and dissatisfaction. Without a sense of purpose, it's easy to feel directionless and stuck which can increase stress, anxiety and even cause depression. We may struggle to find motivation, feel disconnected from others, and question whether our actions matter.

A lack of meaning can also make it harder to cope with setbacks, as we may feel there’s no deeper reason to keep going. We may make impulsive decisions and make statements like “what’s the point?”. Over time, this attitude towards life can lead to low self-esteem, unhealthy coping habits and a general sense of hopelessness about the future. YIKES!

On the flipside meaning gives us:

• A sense of direction: When you know what matters to you, it becomes easier to make decisions and set priorities based on that.

• Resilience in tough times: A meaningful life provides emotional strength and a reason to keep going when things get harder than usual.

• Fulfillment and satisfaction: Achievements feel more rewarding when they’re connected to something that holds personal significance.

• Connection with others: A shared sense of meaning strengthens relationships and creates a sense of belonging which we all need.

The challenge though, is that meaning isn’t a one-time discovery—it’s something you have to actively cultivate and maintain over time as life unravels.

How to create lasting meaning in your life

Creating meaning isn’t about finding some grand, all-encompassing purpose overnight. It’s about aligning your daily life with what matters most to you and making intentional choices that reflect those values. Here’s how to do that in a sustainable way:

1. Clarify what matters most to you aka your values

Meaning starts with understanding what matters most to you. Your values are the guiding principles that shape your decisions and behavior. When your life aligns with your values, you feel more connected and at peace.

Here are some values that often give people a deep sense of meaning in life:

1. Love & Relationships – Prioritizing deep, meaningful connections with others.

2. Compassion & Kindness – Helping others and making a positive impact.

3. Growth & Learning – Continuously improving and expanding knowledge.

4. Authenticity – Living in alignment with your true self.

5. Creativity – Expressing yourself through art, ideas, or innovation.

6. Contribution – Giving back to your community or the world.

7. Resilience – Overcoming challenges and growing stronger.

8. Freedom – Having autonomy and making your own choices.

9. Spirituality – Connecting with something greater than yourself.

10. Curiosity – Exploring and seeking new experiences.

11. Integrity – Acting with honesty and strong moral principles.

12. Gratitude – Appreciating life’s moments and blessings.

13. Purpose – Pursuing goals that align with your values.

14. Health & Well-being – Taking care of your physical and mental health.

15. Joy & Playfulness – Finding happiness in everyday life.

How to identify your values:

• Ask yourself: What kind of person do I want to be?

• Reflect on moments when you felt truly fulfilled—what values were you honoring in those moments?

• Make a list of values that resonate with you (e.g. honesty, love and relationships, creativity, compassion, growth).

• Choose 3 to 5 core values and explore how they currently show up in your life—and how you’d like them to show up more.

For example, I value love and relationships but I realized I’ve been neglecting connecting with my family and friends on a deeper level, due to being busy and procrastination. Committing to small practices—like reaching out more often, being present during family gatherings and just appreciating the connections I have —has helped me reconnect with that value and feel more aligned/purposeful.

What matters most to you?

2. Set meaningful goals

Goals give structure to your sense of purpose, but not all goals are created equal. Research shows that goals rooted in your core values are more motivating and satisfying, than those based on external rewards (like money or status).

How to set meaningful goals:

• Focus on goals that align with your values.

• Break large goals into small, manageable steps.

• Measure success based on personal growth, not just external results.

• Allow room for flexibility—meaning isn’t about perfection, but about progress.

For instance, I value connection and I set a goal to reach out to a friend once a week. Whether its via text or call, I make a point to let them know I’m thinking about them no matter how busy and awkward I feel. I also value personal growth and learning, which is why I commit to taking mental health courses, constantly learning new recipes that bring me joy through cooking.

Are your goals meaningful?

3. Create a sense of contribution

Contributing to something larger than yourself is a powerful source of meaning. When you feel like your efforts benefit others or make a positive impact, it strengthens your sense of purpose.

Some ways to contribute:

• Volunteer for a cause you care about like animal rights or healthy eating.

• Offer emotional support to a friend or family member.

• Share your knowledge or skills with others.

• Be intentional about practicing kindness in your daily interactions.

Contribution doesn’t have to be grand or involve money—it’s about making a difference where you can. Even small acts of kindness and support can create a lasting sense of fulfillment.

How can you show up for others today?

4. Start training yourself to cultivate mindfulness and presence

It’s easy to miss moments of meaning when you’re constantly distracted by scrolling endlessly or overwhelmed; ruminating on problems. Mindfulness—being fully present in the moment—helps you connect with your life more deeply and recognize meaning in everyday experiences because now is all we’ll ever have.

How to practice mindfulness daily:

• Spend a few minutes each day focused on your breathing. Big inhale through your nose, exhale for 4 seconds, rinse and repeat as long and often as you can.

• Pay attention to your senses as you go about your daily activities. Do you smell the food in the air? Is the sky especially blue and clear as you walk through the park? Was that the sound of the dishwasher or a dog barking on the street? Start noticing.

• Limit distractions, especially from your phone and social media. Use an app like Opal to set limits on apps that suck you in like Insta or Tiktok, even the news which packs a hefty dose of negativity.

• Pause and reflect when something meaningful happens—let yourself truly feel it. Like when your friend has an honest conversation with you about her struggles, or you cried to get some relief from the grind.

When you slow down and pay attention to the present moment, you’re more likely to notice the richness and significance of your daily life.

You matter!

5. Take advantage of the growth that comes with challenges

Crazy as it sounds, meaning often emerges from moments when life kicks us in the butt with big boots. Challenges and setbacks can refine your character, deepen your understanding of yourself aka self-awareness and give you a greater appreciation for what matters to you.

How to grow through challenges:

• Acknowledge your feelings without judgment.

• Choose the perspective that gives you hope, by looking for lessons or insights in difficult situations.

• Ask yourself: How can this experience make me stronger or wiser?

• Focus on what you can control (no matter how small), rather than dwelling on what you can’t.

For example, if you experience a career setback like getting fired from your job, it could push you to explore a new path that’s more aligned with your values.

While adversity can be painful, it’s often where the deepest growth happens.

Breathe! Go easy, take the lessons and carry on!

6. Build meaningful relationships

Human connection is one of the most reliable sources of lasting meaning. When you invest in meaningful relationships of friends and family who show up for you, you create a support system that helps you navigate life’s ups and downs.

How to nurture relationships:

• Make time for regular connection with the people who matter to you.

• Ditch the phone! Be present and engaged during conversations.

• Offer support without judgment or trying to “fix” the other person.

• Express gratitude for the people in your life as often as you can.

Healthy, supportive relationships create a foundation of belonging and security that reinforces your sense of purpose.

7. Accept that meaning evolves over time

Imagine meaning not as a straight line, but a bumpy curve on a chart. What feels meaningful to you today might not feel meaningful five years from now—and that’s okay. As you change and evolve through the different stages of your life, so does your sense of meaning because it is not static.

How to stay adaptable:

• Regularly check in with yourself about what matters the most. (Repeat step 1)

• Be willing to adjust your goals and priorities as your life circumstances change.

• Embrace change as part of the process of growth.

Meaning isn’t about finding a single purpose and sticking to it forever—it’s about staying open and responsive to life’s natural shifts.

Final thoughts

Creating meaning in your life isn’t about having all the answers—it’s about making intentional choices everyday that align with your values and allow you to grow. When you clarify what matters most, set meaningful goals, contribute to others, and stay present in the moment, you create a foundation for a fulfilling life.

Remember, it’s not about perfection—it’s about progress. Your sense of meaning will evolve over time, and that’s a sign of growth. Trust the process, be kind to yourself along the way, and know that you have the power to create a life filled with purpose and satisfaction.

If you’re struggling to find meaning or feel stuck, working with a CBT therapist can provide valuable guidance. Therapy can help you identify your values, overcome mental roadblocks, and develop strategies to build a life that feels truly meaningful.

Your life matters—and you have the strength to create meaning that lasts.

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